Don't use no double negatives.

William Safire cracks me up. He is well known for his syndicated political column for The New York Times, but my fave factoid is that he is a regular contributor to "On Language" in the NYT Sunday Mag. The column is on popular etymology, new or unusual usages, and other language-related topics.

He has generated a list which I am handing out to my poor trapped guinea pigs today--"Fumblerules". It consists of sarcastically composed sentences such as
"Do not put statements in the negative form."
--which brings me right around to the most confusing construction--the phrase/fragment that reads something like:

"I would not be unhappy to have a bar of chocolate." GADS! I hate that. Be precise--say what you mean.

Another example of Safire's wit? "Verbs has to agree with its subjects." snicker

I think it is funny.

purposely vague

I went to a meeting last night...it was apparently a convention of Stepfordwives(tm) and Mr Roger's clones. Everyone was so...so...CLEAN and well fed. It scared me. Nothing like the crowd in the city. Each "individual" (I use that term loosely) was in Complete agreement with everyone about everything--no discussion, no alternating opinions--no passion. It was so...white bread, so perfectly well behaved. The gathering of those who abide in houses that the house shitter shit out (to quote my dear one) was to discuss the new park.

If I am the creative rebel--if I am the dynamic force--well Groucho said it best..
"I don't want to be a member of a club that will admit me."

Now granted they were celebrating a victorious lawsuit to purchase said property away from nasty developers--and I know I have a couple associates in the subs somewhere --but honestly...they were, hell I can't think of the word...oh hang on--UNIFORM!

Not my first choice for a morning activity

Mulching leaves at Wallace took about oh... 45 minutes. I have been mulching leaves for over two hours. AND I'M NOT DONE! I have to let the mower cool off. My ears are ringing--not as bad as the were on National Chipper Vac Day--but bad enough. I think I vibrated my pinky off. I feel like a poorly groomed race horse--got all sweaty now I am freezing. It is supposed to snow tonight. Happily for the only bit of "lawn" we are concerned about being *turf* is all good. I got the croquet field mulched up and put in the compost barrel. The barrel always amazes me. Ya stuff it full and it all just magics itself into 1/16 it's former mass. I shoulda took three pictures-- one of the area with the leaves--one shot without the the leaves (just straight lines of mulch--like when you vacuum plush carpet--the ugliest green and gold striped shag carpet--kinda Brady Bunch style... and then the third pic would have to wait for the small pile of "black gold" I will get this spring. At least the croquet field is okay for this batch of droppings--the two biggest trees are still holding their leaves but I bet they drop them this week. Then I did the outside of the driveway (s) and put those clippings on the flower bed by the parking spots--but if global warming works in my favor it will rain like a bitch--wash the new mulch down into the turf--freeze the clingy leaves--they drop-- and I repeat what I did this morning on a some sunny day next week. Gods--if I ever needed convincing for the native grass meadow (which I didn't) I am convinced now that monoculture manicured lawns are the devil's work. I promise you dear one-- any chance of maintaining the golf course are DEAD. This place is freaking huge. We gotta get a goat.

I can't wait till they tear up the barn area for the geothermal coils. Then I can see what planting pattern I will have. I think they are gonna do a big loop? Soon I will know for sure..we got approved for the financing and they claim to have it all done by Turkey Day---EEP!